“I’m sorry. I know it’s my fault. I am the only person to be blamed.”
While this seems chivalrous when we have actually committed a mistake, the above statement also shows a sign of inveterate habit of feeling guilty about everything.
Feeling guilty about a bad thing we’ve happened to do is great. It shows that one is aware of the things he has done and its impact on others. But, like all things, there’s an extent up to which feeling guilty is considered normal.
The feeling of guilt claws our interior and makes us feel hollow. Feeling guilty is one thing and letting that guilt rip you apart is other.
Given below are few ways to stop this habit of blaming yourself and feeling guilty about every minor or major catastrophe in your or others life.
You are not defined by one bad action:
If you get into a fight with someone, doesn’t mean that you are an aggressive person. Will you become a bad person if you did something wrong once? I know you are accountable for what you do, but that small action doesn’t define your whole personality. There are fifty shades of you and trust me, some of them could be dark.
Don’t make a mountain out of a molehill:
I’ve known people who take their feelings of guilt unnecessary so huge. They constantly let that one mistake circle round their head until they are unable to work productively. It’s okay if you went home a little late that day, but do not let yourself feel so guilty about it, that you lock yourself up in a cell and pledge to never go out again.
To err is human:
As a human, you are entitled to make mistakes. It’s your birthright. There’s not a single person in this entire population who hasn’t made a single mistake. When someone tries to achieve perfectionism, he fails. It is not because he is unqualified, it’s because perfection is an ideal state, and like all things ideal- it’s unachievable in your human form.
There’s no need to feel guilty about your mistakes because your guilt won’t change a thing. Focus on how to make things right again.
Optimism is the key:
Every dark cloud has a silver lining. Most of our guilt comes as a result of feeling that we failed at something. Learn to see the positive side of things. You could feel guilty about arguing with a friend or you could be grateful that you didn’t punch him in the heat of the argument.
[bctt tweet=”There are fifty shades of you and trust me, some of them could be dark.” username=”zistboon”]You are not responsible for other people’s happiness:
When you think that you hurt someone or did wrong to them, you feel guilty. You feel as though you are responsible for whatever happened to them. There are many instances when children feel guilty about scoring a 70 in a test because they feel that they have let their parents down, who expected a 90.
It is not upon us to please others; nor can we please everyone around. If we start feeling guilty about every unhappy person in our vicinity, we are doomed with a burden of guilt.
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The whole point of this article is not to uninstall this preloaded application of guilt from our system, but rather to prevent it from taking control of us like a virus.
